I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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