Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
