we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
where are my eyebrows?
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