He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
