Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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