I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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