Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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