Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize