you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize