OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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