We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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