Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
