Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
