Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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