I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
now i know why i became what i already was.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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