i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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