you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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