Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
