bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
