id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
