1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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