Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  You can't special order awesome

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  (404): You can't special order awesome http://tfl.nu/116h
  Replies (14) Good night (2912) Bad night (641)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.

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  (403): just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong. http://tfl.nu/sr7f
  Replies (19) Good night (2300) Bad night (911)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  that is the greatest description ever

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  (440): it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once (1-440): that is the greatest description ever http://tfl.nu/1t1l
  Replies (9) Good night (2261) Bad night (448)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.

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  (717): If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone. http://tfl.nu/j92l
  Replies (13) Good night (530) Bad night (2952)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick

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  (818): she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick http://tfl.nu/e1f8
  Replies (12) Good night (847) Bad night (4138)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  He tried peeing out of the sunroof.

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  (847): He tried peeing out of the sunroof. http://tfl.nu/ep38
  Replies (5) Good night (1387) Bad night (3084)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.

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  (337): Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life. http://tfl.nu/xhxl
  Replies (15) Good night (2532) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (620): View more from Kansas

  new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either

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  (620): new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either http://tfl.nu/a5gg
  Replies (3) Good night (2125) Bad night (829)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.

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  (512): We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots. http://tfl.nu/ta1s
  Replies (10) Good night (1234) Bad night (1696)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.

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  (815): We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of. http://tfl.nu/md9p
  Replies (21) Good night (1444) Bad night (2340)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  crossed #23 off the Slucket List!

  (1-925): View more from California

  YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.

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  (925): crossed #23 off the Slucket List! (1-925): YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING. http://tfl.nu/ln8o
  Replies (6) Good night (2662) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it

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  (818): Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it http://tfl.nu/vzjc
  Replies (10) Good night (1435) Bad night (352)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.

  (1-423): View more from Tennessee

  Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.

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  (423): What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there. (1-423): Call it what you want. You fucked a girl. http://tfl.nu/1fty
  Replies (5) Good night (1984) Bad night (748)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.

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  (410): Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences. http://tfl.nu/tv4t
  Replies (2) Good night (1179) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (+66): View more from Thailand

  i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked

  (1+66): View more from

  oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you

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  (+66): i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked (1+66): oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you http://tfl.nu/vprd
  Replies (1) Good night (904) Bad night (236)

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