Texts From Last Night

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  (936): View more from Texas

  Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.

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  (936): Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy. http://tfl.nu/jygh
  Replies (15) Good night (6554) Bad night (735)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.

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  (978): The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room. http://tfl.nu/rw2d
  Replies (58) Good night (2003) Bad night (5654)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.

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  (404): alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night. http://tfl.nu/ialt
  Replies (43) Good night (667) Bad night (4783)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.

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  (561): i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks. http://tfl.nu/2sae
  Replies (17) Good night (12693) Bad night (1014)
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  (914): View more from New York

  The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"

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  (914): The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner" http://tfl.nu/76ix
  Replies (11) Good night (5979) Bad night (2068)
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  (714): View more from California

  I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.

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  (714): I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor. http://tfl.nu/i3nt
  Replies (5) Good night (1027) Bad night (3425)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.

  (1-806): View more from Texas

  Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.

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  (806): Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk. (1-806): Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess. http://tfl.nu/c175
  Replies (15) Good night (2600) Bad night (1200)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.

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  (432): This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire. http://tfl.nu/8ui6
  Replies (10) Good night (2269) Bad night (1186)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up

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  (+44): Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up http://tfl.nu/86tf
  Replies (3) Good night (715) Bad night (976)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.

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  (724): NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside. http://tfl.nu/mev5
  Replies (3) Good night (752) Bad night (438)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..

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  (201): I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again.. (973): We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks.. http://tfl.nu/kzt5
  Replies (4) Good night (1687) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.

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  (+44): Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face. http://tfl.nu/j54i
  Replies (8) Good night (2522) Bad night (487)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.

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  (310): All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta. http://tfl.nu/aprf
  Replies (2) Good night (1494) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling

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  (843): Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling http://tfl.nu/p0kx
  Replies (6) Good night (422) Bad night (799)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.

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  (304): I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket. http://tfl.nu/s9lg
  Replies (1) Good night (484) Bad night (154)

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