erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...