I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.