Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate

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(313): Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate http://tfl.nu/xmwg

Replies (15) Good night (1574) Bad night (4180)
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(312): View more from Illinois

Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.

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(312): Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired. http://tfl.nu/6uiz

Replies (23) Good night (4060) Bad night (846)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.

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(908): there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo. http://tfl.nu/6eag

Replies (37) Good night (4625) Bad night (1056)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.

(504): View more from Louisiana

Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER

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(504): I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging. (504): Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER http://tfl.nu/kpd3

Replies (38) Good night (6265) Bad night (813)
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(270): View more from Kentucky

I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?

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(270): I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea? http://tfl.nu/h6xa

Replies (43) Good night (9433) Bad night (2520)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle

(1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other

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(306): They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle (1-306): Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other http://tfl.nu/7xcc

Replies (9) Good night (5506) Bad night (1108)
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(818): View more from California

Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.

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(818): Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed. http://tfl.nu/scsc

Replies (14) Good night (2311) Bad night (823)
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(207): View more from Maine

remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?

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(207): remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are? http://tfl.nu/u6le

Replies (6) Good night (2475) Bad night (809)
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(281): View more from Texas

that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.

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(281): that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms. http://tfl.nu/qnq5

Replies (18) Good night (1975) Bad night (979)
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(801): View more from Utah

Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.

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(801): Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated. http://tfl.nu/dcl8

Replies (6) Good night (1860) Bad night (819)
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(312): View more from Illinois

All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.

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(312): All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday. http://tfl.nu/9i7k

Replies (1) Good night (752) Bad night (1153)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?

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(405): Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you? http://tfl.nu/1gun

Replies (14) Good night (1102) Bad night (1215)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.

(901): View more from Tennessee

But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.

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(901): I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes. (901): But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes. http://tfl.nu/ipaj

Replies (4) Good night (1108) Bad night (425)
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(518): View more from New York

I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing

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(518): I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing http://tfl.nu/06p1

Replies (3) Good night (761) Bad night (331)
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(443): View more from Maryland

I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.

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(443): I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up. http://tfl.nu/vhgn

Replies (1) Good night (841) Bad night (312)

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