we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
home. puking in laundry basket.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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