i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
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