uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
