Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
