I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
