why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
