i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
