can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize