im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
