there was a trapeze. enough said
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
