I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
