she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
