So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Randomize
