I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
