All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
