He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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