It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
