I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I have feelings that need drinking.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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