Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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