R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
