i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize