All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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