I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
