i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
