Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
