It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
We left the knife in your bed.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
