The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
