I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
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